Cori: Welcome to this podcast titled “Understanding the BC Parenting Coordinator Participation Agreement.” This is “Part One: What Parenting Coordinators Do, Family Violence Screening and Confidentiality”. I'm Cori McGuire, a lawyer and Parenting Coordinator in British Columbia. If you've been referred to Parenting Coordination, chances are you've just received a lengthy Participation Agreement and your first reaction was something like: "What on earth am I signing?" That's a completely normal reaction. This series is designed to walk you through the initial meeting with the Parenting Coordinator and parent where the agreement is explained in plain language. It is not legal advice and it doesn't replace the agreement itself, but it will help you understand why the agreement exists and how Parenting Coordination actually works. Today we're going to start with the most basic question of all: What exactly am I signing?
Host: Okay Cori, I'll be honest. If somebody emailed me a twenty-page contract and asked me to sign it, I'd probably scroll to the signature page and wonder if I was signing my life away. So let's start with the obvious question. What exactly is this Participation Agreement?
Cori: The Participation Agreement is the document that creates the working relationship between the parents and the Parenting Coordinator. But more importantly, it explains how disputes are going to be managed. Many parents assume they're simply hiring a professional to give advice. In reality, Parenting Coordination is a structured legal process. The agreement explains everyone's role, how information is gathered, how disputes are handled, what can happen when parents disagree, how decisions may be made and what rights everyone has throughout the process.
Host: Let's get right to the question everybody is thinking. Am I basically hiring a private judge?
Cori: No. That's probably the biggest misconception about Parenting Coordination. A Parenting Coordinator is not a judge. A Parenting Coordinator is also not a therapist, not a family counsellor and not a lawyer for either parent. A Parenting Coordinator is a neutral professional whose job is to help parents implement an existing parenting arrangement. That distinction is important. We're not deciding where a child should live. We're usually dealing with practical problems that arise after parents have already separated and already have a parenting plan. A Parenting Coordinator does the work to implement the parenting plan in the best interests of the child.
Questions like:
How should this holiday work?
How should this school issue be implemented?
How should this exchange happen?
How should this parenting plan operate in real life?
Those practical disputes can occur over and over again unless there is a process to address them.
Host:
But if parents already have a court order or a separation agreement, why do they need you? Isn't the order supposed to solve the problem?
Cori: Orders and agreements solve many problems. What they often don't do is answer every future question. Most parenting plans contain general principles. They rarely contain instructions for every situation a family may encounter during the next ten years. Life keeps happening. Children grow. Schools change. Schedules change. Activities arise. Parents disagree about implementation. That's where Parenting Coordination often becomes helpful. The goal is not to rewrite the parenting plan. The goal is to help parents make the parenting plan work.
Host: Give me a practical example.
Cori: Imagine the parenting agreement says: "The parents will share responsibility for extracurricular activities." That sounds clear until a child wants to play competitive hockey. Suddenly the parents disagree about:
Who drives?
Who pays?
Which practices matter?
Whether the child should even be enrolled?
The order may never have answered those questions. Those are implementation problems. That's where Parenting Coordination often operates.
Host:
What I'm hearing is that the agreement isn't really about controlling parents. It's about creating a process.
Cori: Exactly. I often tell parents that the agreement is less about parenting and more about process. The agreement creates structure. It explains:
How issues are raised.
How information may be gathered.
How discussions take place.
How decisions may be made if agreement cannot be reached.
Without a process, high-conflict parents often end up having the same fight repeatedly. The agreement creates a framework designed to move things forward.
Host:
If I sign this agreement, can I just call you every time I'm frustrated with the other parent?
Cori:
You can certainly raise concerns. But Parenting Coordination is not intended to become ongoing commentary about the other parent. One of the goals of the process is to focus on issues that actually require implementation or resolution. Many parents arrive believing the process is about telling their story. In reality, the process is usually focused on identifying the issue that needs to be addressed and determining what practical step needs to occur next.
Host: Let's be honest. Some parents probably come in hoping you will agree with them.
Cori: Absolutely. And sometimes both parents arrive hoping for exactly the same thing. The challenge is that the Parenting Coordinator's job is not to choose sides. The role is neutral. That means parents will sometimes hear things they don't want to hear. Neutrality does not mean agreeing equally with everyone. It means approaching issues impartially and focusing on implementation rather than advocacy.
Host: What is the biggest misunderstanding parents have before they sign?
Cori:
The biggest misunderstanding is that Parenting Coordination is another opportunity to continue the separation dispute. It isn't. Parenting Coordination is primarily forward-looking. The process focuses on implementation. Many parents arrive wanting to establish who was right in the past. Most of the time the more important question is: "What needs to happen next so the parenting arrangement actually works?" That shift in perspective often makes the entire agreement easier to understand.
Host:
So if I can summarize today's discussion: I'm not hiring a private judge. I'm not hiring a therapist. I'm not hiring a lawyer. I'm entering a structured process designed to help implement an existing parenting arrangement and resolve disputes that arise along the way.
Cori: That's exactly right. And once parents understand that, the rest of the Participation Agreement starts to make much more sense.
Host: Okay Cori, let's get right to it. I think this is probably the number one fear parents have. If I sign this agreement, am I handing over control of my child's life to a Parenting Coordinator?
Cori: No. In fact, one of the biggest misunderstandings about Parenting Coordination is the belief that the Parenting Coordinator can simply make whatever parenting decision they think is best. The Participation Agreement and the law place important limits on the Parenting Coordinator's authority. A Parenting Coordinator is generally there to help implement existing parenting arrangements, not create entirely new ones.
Host: Implementation. What does that actually mean?
Cori: Think of it this way. Imagine a parenting plan says that the child will spend Christmas Day with one parent in odd-numbered years and the other parent in even-numbered years. That's the big decision. But then questions arise.
What time does the exchange occur?
What if Christmas falls in the middle of another parenting block?
What happens if weather affects travel?
Those implementation questions often aren't fully addressed by the parenting plan. The Parenting Coordinator may be able to help resolve those practical details. The Parenting Coordinator is usually helping the existing arrangement function.
Host: Let's ask the question parents really want answered. Can you decide where my child lives?
Cori: Generally speaking, no. Major parenting issues often remain outside the Parenting Coordinator's authority. A Parenting Coordinator is not a replacement judge. The agreement contains limits on what can be determined. If parents are looking for someone to fundamentally redesign parenting arrangements, Parenting Coordination is often not the appropriate process. Those types of disputes may require negotiation, mediation, arbitration or court involvement.
Host: What about parenting time? Can you change the schedule?
Cori: The answer depends on what we're talking about. Parents often think in very broad terms. For example:
"Can the Parenting Coordinator change parenting time?"
Sometimes what they really mean is:
"Can the Parenting Coordinator adjust a pickup time by thirty minutes?"
Those are very different questions. Many implementation issues involve operating an existing schedule. A Parenting Coordinator may have authority to address certain practical scheduling questions depending on the court order, agreement and applicable authority. That's very different from creating an entirely different parenting schedule.
Host: It sounds like there is a boundary between implementing a parenting plan and changing a parenting plan.
Cori: Exactly. That's one of the most important ideas parents can understand. A useful question is:
"What existing term or arrangement is being implemented?"
The closer a dispute is to implementing an existing arrangement, the more likely it may fall within Parenting Coordinator authority. The further a dispute moves toward changing the arrangement itself, the more likely it falls outside that authority.
Host: Can you give me an example?
Cori: Certainly. Imagine an order says the child attends a particular school. The order doesn't specify where exchanges occur after school. Parents begin arguing about pickup locations. A Parenting Coordinator may be helping implement the existing arrangement by addressing a practical issue that was never spelled out. Compare that with a parent asking to move the child to a completely different school. That's a much bigger issue. Now we're no longer talking about implementation of an existing arrangement. We're talking about potentially changing it.
Host: School seems to come up all the time after separation. "Can You Decide School Issues?"
Cori: Many day-to-day educational decisions can create conflict. Field trips. Tutoring. Parent-teacher meetings. Information sharing. How consultation occurs. Implementation questions arise constantly. The Parenting Coordinator's authority depends on the authorizing documents and the applicable legal framework. Parents sometimes assume school issues are automatically outside the Parenting Coordinator's role or automatically inside it. The reality is usually more nuanced.
Host: Another question parents might ask is: Can't you simply decide whatever is in the child's best interests?
Cori: Not quite. That's another common misunderstanding. The fact that an idea seems beneficial does not automatically create authority to impose it. The first question is always: Do I actually have authority to deal with this issue? Only after that question is answered do we examine how the issue should be addressed. Parents are often surprised by how important jurisdiction is in Parenting Coordination.
Host: So when parents sign the Participation Agreement, what authority are they actually agreeing to?
Cori: They're agreeing to participate in a structured implementation process. They're agreeing that certain disputes may be addressed through Parenting Coordination rather than immediately returning to court. They're agreeing that the Parenting Coordinator may assist, facilitate, make recommendations and in some circumstances make determinations within delegated authority. What they're not doing is appointing someone with unlimited power over their family.
Host: So a takeaway from today's episode is that Parenting Coordination is not about giving someone unlimited authority over your children. It's about helping existing parenting arrangements work.
Cori: Exactly. The Parenting Coordinator's role is significant, but it is not unlimited. Understanding that distinction helps parents understand almost every other part of the Participation Agreement.
Host: Next we're going to talk about something many parents find uncomfortable when they first enter Parenting Coordination: family violence screening and all those personal questions you ask during intake.
Cori: And we'll talk about why that process exists, what happens to that information and why it is one of the most important parts of the entire agreement.
Written by Cori L. McGuire, family law mediator, arbitrator, collaborative family law lawyer and Parenting Coordinator with a family law practice in British Columbia since 1998.
© 2026 Cori McGuire. All Rights Reserved. Proprietary Workflow.
